Where do we go from here?

It's hard to believe it's been almost 2 years since taking a buyout from Ford. Am I where I expected to be? Hardly....

Let's start from the beginning and see who else feels like I do.

What made me decide to leave a $28.00 an hour job with benefits?

I have always felt that I could do better. I could use my brains and do something I would like and make good money.

After 13.5 years working on the line, feeling my body going down hill, injections braces, and surgeries. The company was still going to close 2 more plants in the U.S., and we could have easily been one of them. I really did not want to try to look for a job with 3000 or so other people in addition to the regular unemployed population already. My wife and I decided that I could quit and take the money from the buyout and we could start flipping houses. TV and all the books made it look too easy. I've done multiple types of construction, and was pretty confident I could handle, or find someone who could, any problem I ran into in a home.

I didn't ever think I would ever have a hard time buying a house at the county auction. I would do all of my homework on all the houses I thought would be good investments weeks before. Market research, lien research, etc...I did it all. I took classes at Ford for distressed properties. I even learned how to be a home inspector in case I needed something to fall back on.

After multiple times of bidding, only to be outbid by the bank, months went by. Money was disappearing. At the time we lived in a beautiful house in a real nice neighborhood. Payments were a little higher than I would've liked, but we were going to make at least $15,000 - $30,000 on the first deal, so we weren't to worried about it.

In addition to knowing the first flip was right around the corner, I was a licensed home inspector at this point and my wife had an embroidery business. Everything was going to be fine.

After 6 or 8 months of the bank account getting smaller and smaller, now our health insurance was at and end. We had to find new insurance. The best deal I could find for a family of four was about $550/month and that's if you didn't use it. Ad that on top of the other bills, I started getting really nervous.

Anxiety set in.....sleeplessness set in......DEPRESSION set in........Chest pains...
Before this time I never really understood depression. I couldn't understand how people could feel so low...so worthless.

I tried a couple of sleep medications (prescribed), which I had never in my life needed. They worked, but mad my brain mush some days..difficulty concentrating.

I tried anti depressants (prescribed), which I had never in my life had needed.

Did they work? A little, but I kind of felt like a zombie some days. Keep taking them is what I was told, it will get better. Again a couple of months have gone by.

For the first time in my life, besides being "young and in love and being dumped by the one who you knew as The One", thoughts of possible suicide enter my mind. When I was younger it was a fleeting thought that I knew I could or would not ever do. I knew it would get better. As an adult with two kids and a wife who need me to provide for them, it was making sense. I wasn't providing right now, we were surviving. The money in the bank had dropped to $20,000 or so. If I died in an accident, which by watching CSI shows I could figure out how to, my wife and kids would get somewhere around $500,000 - $750,000.

It's really a sad situation when you realize you are worth WAY more dead than alive. The house could be paid for, money could be in the bank. At least they wouldn't have to worry about where to live.

STOP! What are you thinking? You love your family! You want to see them grow up and give you grand kids right?

Finally I realized I needed to share this with my wife. I got off of the antidepressants and started praying a lot.

I've always prayed. Not as much as I should, but I would say hi to God and just thank him for all I had sometimes. I've never been one to really ask for too much from God, I always figured there were people out there that needed him more than me.

Flash forward another couple of months - I am a NEW home inspector. The Real Estate market is getting worse and worse. I am marketing to Realtors in Louisville, Bardstown, Elizabethtown, Radcliff, anywhere within 70 miles or so. My wife's business is still new also and not making much money. Enough to cover it's bills.

I'm getting a couple of home inspections per month. In order to survive I need 4 to 5 a week.

So now I'm starting to give up a little. It's becoming winter. Home sales screech to a halt. I have to get some type of job. $12.00 and hour is what I get paid and no benefits, down from $28.00. Wow, what a difference a little more than a year makes.

I decide to start another business with a guy that seems like he knows what he's talking about, we've know him for awhile, he seems trustworthy. I borrow the money from relatives to get the new venture started.

Now just because I'm not taking antidepressants at this point doesn't mean I'm not depressed, believe me I am.

House is for sale now, by owner...Not selling

Month 1, no bites on the house.

Marketing and spending a lot of time on the new business. Working full time at the other job also.

Month 2....


Marketing and spending a lot of time on the new business. Working full time at the other job also.

Month 3.....

Marketing and spending a lot of time on the new business. Working full time at the other job also.

Month 4....

Marketing and spending a lot of time on the new business. Working full time at the other job also.

Month 5...

....all buyout money gone...starting to be late on house payments. First time ever.

Time to list with a Realtor, thankfully I have a mother in law that can help there. At least we can save a little on commissions.

More good news, I find out my new business partner is taking any and all extra money out of the new business, forging checks in my name to personal expenses. My wife and I go through the books and see that at this point I have invested $9000 in this thing, I have taken less than $500 out and the partner has taken around $4000.00 out. The last straw was when I was going to pay rent for the business and he took all the money out to pay his personal rent at home and took out a $200 withdrawal at the ATM.

Back to the house...after dropping our price a couple of times we finally get an offer. $25,000 less than our asking price! We had our house custom built 7 years ago, we put extras in it that were well worth it. We were not out of the ball park at all on our price.

I was a little mad at this point. I am a month or two behind for the second or third time on payments. We counter, they counter, we counter back one more time...accepted.

Now I'm closing on my house with nowhere to go, and I am hiring a lawyer to get me out of the new business situation and try to recover my investment money I borrowed. Luckily that situation got resolved.

Finally I can stop worrying about the house payment. We sell the house. So after 7 years of payments, how much equity did we have left? If you added up all my payments since we lived there I put in about $100,000 into it. We received a return on our investment of about $4000.

Homeless...Staying with relatives...can't get a loan from the bank because of the mortgage melt down crisis, and since we have new business' we can't even get a home loan. Damaged credit to boot.

Now what?